4 Months Old!

My little darlings are 4 months old today! Can they really be that old already!? Time is flying. I go both ways. I wish it would slow down because they're going to be in Kindergarten before I know it and then on the other side I can't wait till they're a little older because this is a LOT of work and I really cannot wait till they sleep through the night. ;-)

Exciting developmental news! We have rollers!! Walker rolled back to front a week ago and then a few days later went front to back. He doesn't do it ALL the time but it's getting more consistent. Jocelyn just rolled front to back for the first time on Tuesday! They're definitely going to be moving soon! :-) Hmm is that good or bad!? ;-) They do so wonderful at Tummy Time now. It's amazing what just a week makes in their development. It was like one day they hated it and just lifted their heads up here and there and then the next day they were both up on their arms and head lifted high and practicing rolling over! They're amazing!

Here are a couple videos... The first one shows Walker rolling and the 2nd was supposed to be both of them but of course as soon as I get the camera out, they stop but it does show how great they are doing at lifting themselves up.



I'm really having doubts on continuing breastfeeding much longer. At least exclusively. I'm so completely drained and I really don't think they're getting enough at one time. They still eat SO often and wake up at least 3-4 times a night. I'm getting very little sleep which I'm sure isn't good on my supply. My stress level is pretty high as well so I'm sure that's not helping either. The bad thing is they hate formula. I've been pumping 2-4 oz a day to stash in the freezer for when I have to leave them for appointments but I really want to start using that towards getting them used to formula. They'll take it if I mix it 1/3 formula to 2/3 expressed breast milk. They don't even seem to notice it. We haven't tried 1/2 and 1/2 yet because I'm scared to dip into the supply with appointments coming up. We've decided they hate Enfamil (taste) and they seemed to do ok with Good Start (mixed with breast milk) but hate it by itself. I did a lot of reading and found a lovely Blog where this guy actually tasted the different formulas (and some people chimed in with the taste of BM too). Anyway - they all say Enfamil does not taste so good, but Similac had a sweeter taste like breast milk. Not completely but closer. The pediatrician had given us a ton of free samples (a variety) when they were little so we tried the Similac Advance the other day. I just mixed 2 oz (no sense in wasting it) and gave each of them 1 oz in a bottle. They weren't overly hungry so they didn't drink much of it. I really just wanted to see how they reacted to the flavor. They didn't make the horrid taste face they normally do and drank a little bit. They weren't thrilled about it and definitely weren't hungry but they did ok with the flavor. SO we may be looking at Similac as an option for supplementation. We'll see. I get so torn. I'm just kind of feeling ready to be done. I'm exhausted all the time and I think they would last longer between feedings (and get better sleep!) if they were able to eat more at one time. If I could pump tons then I would go that route but I just don't pump much....even when it's 3 hours since they've eaten last (and that's longer than they normally go). I know they love breastfeeding though so that kind of breaks my heart. I may just do a couple of breastfeedings a day and supplement with formula for a couple other feedings (and try to pump some to add to their bottles of formula). Then when they are more ready to wean we'll be prepared. I breastfed my oldest son for 3 months and moved to formula and we were both just fine. I think I have more guilt over it now because I stay at home with them and I "should" keep breastfeeding till they're a year. I always meant to switch to exclusive pumping when they were 3-4 months old (definitely by 6) but I get SO little when I pump that it makes me think that won't work. SO there is my dilemna. Most likely what will happen is as soon as I get these next appointments done (March 30, April 6, April 21) I will start getting serious about switching over. We'll see. I'm just so darn drained all the time. I know that they are getting enough to eat because they are healthy and happy babies (not to mention the cute little fat rolls) but they eat VERY often and aren't able to make it anywhere near to through the night yet. We have our 4 month appointment next week so we'll see how much they weigh now. My best guess is around 13-15 pounds for both of them. Jocelyn is definitely lighter.

Anyway, that is where we are now. They are a joy to be with. They do a lot of smiling and talking and have started laughing here and there. I love it! We still don't really have a schedule. I tried to make one with naps and all that but they're just not falling into it yet and they're so different. We'll get there. SO for now we're still focusing on bedtime and working the kinks out there. We are trying now to get them to fall asleep on their own (without us holding them/nursing) so they will HOPEFULLY start being able to fall asleep on their own when they wake in the middle of the night (and aren't hungry). Jocelyn's still in the swing (yes I know we HAVE to get her out of there...) and Walker is in his crib. We'll work on Miss J next week in her crib. We were going to try to do 3 minute increments of going out and coming in and even that wasn't working. They ended up just screaming and not wanting us out of their sights the next day. I couldn't do it. SO Nick sits in front of Jocelyn's swing and sings her lullabies and just gently talks to her until she drifts off and I sit next to Walker with my hand on his belly and gently Shhh him till he falls asleep. They cry (Walker more than Jocelyn) but at least we're right there trying to help them learn to fall asleep. That seems gentler to me. We're still working on night wakings. They usually end up nursing to sleep (which for Walker is not working on most nights...he refuses to go back to his crib....grrrrr LONG nights). Anyway - we're probably doing it the long hard way but until they are a little older I feel more comfortable with this. I'm just a big softie. :-) OK and a sucker! ;-) Anyway - here are a couple of my favorite pictures from the past couple weeks:

Jocelyn smiling :-)

Jocelyn and Walker wearing their Pirate shirts:

Walker cuddling his lovey and sucking on his thumb...SO cute:

Walker loving sitting up:

Jocelyn at Tummy Time

Chance with his babies (Walker lost his pants due to some major spit up)


You can see all of their photos from 3-4 Months by clicking here.

I'll update next week with their weights :-) Hoping to find out when we can start solids too!